My boss is amazing. This is not to be confused with old “bosshole” new one is outstanding. I suppose that’s why there are no posts lately. My new job is unicorns and rainbows most days.
This week, my boss was discussing an issue with a fellow co-worker and told me to take off my employee hat and put on my friend hat so she could speak freely.
Unfortunately for her, she was ill-prepared for me to pretend to take off a fedora and put on a sombrero.
Poor boss. She has no idea what she got herself into when she hired me a few months ago.
I usually write about my work woes. But instead I will call this one a work woah. I am cleaning out my desk, as I’m the last person in my office tonight.
I took the other job offer. I will start on the 9th. So I am telling work on this coming Monday. That gives them a week notice. They usually escort you off the property immediately. So I feel like a week is good. And I feel like I’m as nervous as I was on my last first date. Maybe worse. I’ve been here 13 years. I’ve turned a bevy of milestones here. I turned 21, I got lower car insurance when I turned 25, I had to get insurance here for the first time and not be on my parents’ policies for health insurance, I turned 30 here. I lost my Dad (well we know where he is, but he died) while I was here. I graduated from college while I was here. I got promoted here. I got my own first office here. I got my first company car here. I mean the firsts go on and on.
This means leaving here is a huge WOAH.
I’ve been waiting for something better. I’ve been preparing for this moment for at least 12 of the last 13 years. My new job is killer. I should be excited. Instead, I feel nauseous. I’m not prepared to be the outsider. I’ll miss some of the people here more than I should.
But mostly – I’m concerned that every day interactions with New Girl will now cease. And what will I write about?
We had a benefits meeting today. You may know the one of which I speak. Where they call in the outside people to tell you how much your benefits package will now cost you. The one that may leave you saying: Uh, I can afford this insurance – but then I can’t afford to actually use said insurance.
I took a liter of my water in with me, signed the papers, came back to my desk and commiserated with my fellow co-workers. A few minutes later I went to take a sip of my water and realized I had left it inside the conference room during my meeting. Because it was basically hell and in hell people want ice water, right?
I walk back in, interrupting their bearing of bad news to the next group of us.
Me: Sorry, forgot my water.
Insurance lady #1: Oh! I was wondering whose that was.
Co-worker: It’s always Snark’s, she’s always drinking.
Me: Hashtag truth. *picks up water*
Head Insurance Lady: Oh! Staying hydrated. Good for you! That’s important for good health. And insurance claims!
Me: Uh, it’s just to counteract the vodka.
*opens conference room door*
Me: Or is this vodka? Hmmm?
Vodka would be the only thing that could legitimately counteract the amount of misery that hearing how much you’re paying for insurance brings.