Tag Archives: children

Disappointment

I’m at a funeral. I see this book.

image

I was hoping I’d open it up and see blank pages or “mommy drinks a lot more” as an answer.

#disappointment as it’s just a book that really tries to explain death and funerals to children in a responsible and on-their-level way.

I still stand by my belief that they should make a smart ass one for people like me.

Please provide your best snarky answer to this book’s question to appease me.

Update: we just left. I am banned from funeral homes according to Bestie* and Alice* due to my spotting the “Losing Your Mom” pamphlet as we exited and loudly exclaiming “what, like at the mall?”

*names changed to protect the not so innocent as they also laughed.

Getting real tired of your shit, Autocorrect.

In the span of two days my autocorrect has made affordable and adorable interchangeable more than once.

“You look afforable.”
“That baby actually looks affordable.”

I never lie if a baby is ugly (and they aren’t all beautiful snowflakes, trust me) so I’m pretty sure it’s more believable that I said to one friend that our other friend’s baby looks affordable instead of adorable. I never even corrected myself. And they didn’t question it.

….I’m not sure what that says about me.
Or my friend.

I have, however, decided that adorable should be stricken from my vocabulary. I will start using aesthetically pleasing instead.

Today, you look aesthetically pleasing.